King’s Bazaar of Bad Dreams, more like a nap of fleeting thoughts

UK Cover Version
UK Cover Version

Have you ever awoken feeling a little shook up, or out of sorts because of a bad dream, one you can’t quite remember? I’m sure you have. You try to recall the details if only to sort out why it bothered you, why this particular dream…

If you started a book in 2015, but finished it in 2016, does it count as your first read of the new year? Let’s assume yes, only so that my yearly review is once again a Stephen King book. Last night I finished, The Bazaar of Bad Dreams, a collection of short stories, some previously published, one redone, and one expanded.

After finishing the book, I turned on HBO-Go, hoping to finish the night with a laugh, when I noticed that they finally brought back season one of True Detective. I’ve longed wanted to watch this ever since I caught a partial viewing of one of the last episodes, one that had me curiously riveted. I am only one episode in, so no spoilers please.

In one scene, Matthew McConaughey’s character says something deeply profound about the state of the town he has just moved it. He looks around the parking lot of a grown over boarded-up strip mall, outwardly dejected by what he sees. The mall’s condition is a metaphor on his feelings towards his new surroundings; “This town looks like someone’s memory of an American town, but the memory is fading”.

This quote struck me in many different ways and could be applied to many different ideas, most being political in nature, yet, as I started to write my review, I found that it also applied to King’s latest offering. Substitute the word “memory” for “dream” and you may get a feel for this book.

Have you ever awoken feeling a little shook up, or out of sorts because of a bad dream, one you can’t quite remember? I’m sure you have. You try to recall the details if only to sort out why it bothered you, why this particular dream…

King writes an introduction to each story, telling his constant readers how and why he came up with this particular story idea. I found these tidbits often more entertaining than the actual stories they produced. For me, these stories /dreams felt one-dimensional and wispy around the edges, as if they were fading or had never been fully formed to begin with.

King has always been a favorite of mine (long time readers know of my young adult obsession) because he magically creates well-rounded characters from which deep wells of emotions can be drawn from, even if their lives are only found in a few pages. This time the well turned out to be dry.

This first story, Mile 81, is the only exception, but having been previously published as a Kindle offering, long time readers are left with a collection of stories involving stories that don’t quite work, either they end poorly as with Ur or would have worked if they were longer as with Bad Little Kid and The Dune.

King’s constant readers may find pleasure in a few of these stories, Afterlife, the story of a recently deceased man who finds himself in an office and with a choice, is classic King, but most of others may disappoint. There is no running theme in this collection, other than to say they are a look into the dark side of life, but we expect that from King anyway.

These stories are King’s idea of bad dreams; perhaps they don’t work because he usually offers us up nightmares. These we hold on to, these don’t always fade with time. We constant readers cannot get Quitter’s Inc. or Stand by me out of our minds. The memory of these older stories are what keeps us up at night or have us thinking and talking about long after they end.

King says of this collection, “The best of them have teeth”. I wish that this was true, but the best of them do little more than nip at your brain. One or two may have you thinking, but not for long. The memory of the discomfort leaves you as swiftly as it arrived, leaving you wondering if you were truly uncomfortable in the first place. I’d gladly trade these bad dreams of Kings for his nightmares.

If you feel the way I do, I’d skip this book. If you need a King fix, go back and revisit Night Shift or Skeleton Crew, the best of these stories have fangs.

Suggested reading for the GOP candidates

You might wonder why, but last night I sat through the two hour Republican debate. Yes, part of me does this out of shear delight in seeing the desperate candidates battle each other the title “Winner of dumbest idea”, but another part of me watches because as a member of our voting society, it is incumbent upon me to know where these people stand on issues and what to fear if one of them, god forbid, actually becomes president.

The subject of last night’s 5th debate was national security or as they tried to sell it, “why we all should be shitting our pants right now”. It was a hard choice: Christie wanted us to fear 5 year old refugee orphans, Cruz and Rubio, (both children of immigrants) wanted us to fear not only those that want to come to our country but also those non-whites already here but who do not have proper documentation. I wish my non-white ancestors asked for the Puritan’s papers..but I digress.

During the debate many of the candidates showed their lack of knowledge on the pre-screened questions. Come on people, you knew they were coming! Christie said he wanted to have a serious talk with King Hussein of Jordan about the King’s possible involvement with terrorists. Yeah, good luck with that Christie, that King of Jordan has been dead for 16 years. Trump couldn’t answer the question of which part of our Nuclear Triad is most important (hint this triad comprises of three types of nuclear bomb delivery systems). Trump shrugged and said, “The nuclear power is most important”. I wish the moderator would have followed and asked him “which delivery system should we upgrade?” just to see him squirm.

As the debate went on (and on) it became clear that while these candidates prided themselves on their ability to sound strong, none sounded particularly smart or well read. And maybe that’s the problem with politicians, they do not have time to read. Which is to bad for if they did, it may expand their worldview. So for the good of the country, I’d like to offer a few of the candidates suggested reading material based on their most egregious debate answers.

Trump: “I would knock the hell out of ISIS and when you get these terrorists, you have to take out their families”.

Mr. Trump, while this may sound like it would keep America safe, in reality it would only inflame and then encourage more hate against America. And then…more innocent Americans would die because of your actions. Besides, being a terrorist’s family member is not always something someone choses to be. The sins of the radical should not be the sins of the family; no matter what the Bible, you’ve clearly never read, tells you.

ShalimarClownRushdie

I’d like to suggest you pick up Salman Rushdie’s 2006, “Shalimar the Clown”. In this wonderful and heartbreaking book Mr. Trump, you will not only come face to face with families of radicalized terrorists, you’ll meet the families that once loved them, the families that mourn them, though they live. You’ll come face to face with those who are personally affected by terrorists on a daily basis, yet retain hope, humanity and love for their fellow man. It is a lesson you so obviously need to learn.

Carly Fiorina: On Putin.“I will not speak to him personally until we’ve rebuilt the Sixth Fleet a little bit right under his nose, rebuilt missile defense program in Poland, right under his nose and conducted a few military exercises in the Baltic States.”

dr_strangelove_still6

I wracked my brain trying to come up with a book that would best illustrate what her blustering would mean to the world, but then I remembered she liked watching videos (one in particular no one else has yet seen) so my suggestion is “Dr. Stranglove, Stanley Kubrick’s 1964 satire about the wrong person at the wrong time who got his hands on the wrong button. Seems appropriate enough. Come to think of it, this brief synopsis could also work as the plot to a film about Fiorina’s time as CEO of H.P.

Cruz and Rubio clashed about who would be the strongest on new immigration policies. Both were eager to show the other as weak on illegal immigrants, even though at one time or another both favored amnesty for those who are already in our country.

the-tortilla-curtain1

While there are many good books about Mexican immigrants (and let’s face it, these are the ones Cruz and Rubio are fighting about) written by brilliant Mexican writers, I’m opting one written by an American as not to offend their collective sensitive values. T.C. Boyle’s 1995, “Tortilla Curtin” offers a glimpse in the lives and struggles of illegal immigrants trying to make a living in Los. Angels. From the inside jacket: “Mexican illegals Candido and America Rincon desperately cling to their vision of the American Dream as they fight off starvation in a makeshift camp deep in the ravine”. Maybe if these two privileged son’s of immigrants learned about the truly desperate but hopeful lives of those living in extreme poverty they’d learn to lighten up a bit as they discover an America they have never had to experience. Or, maybe we can just send them to Cuba and see who swims back the fastest.

Carson. What can we say about Carson? The man asked for a moment of silence for the California shooting victims only to say “Thank you” four seconds later. What, a brain surgeon who cannot count to 60? On top of that he mispronounced the name of the RNC chairman, Reince Priebus. I concede it may be hard to pronounce if one has never hear it spoken, but as a member of the GOP, Carson surly has had to of heard the name several times. Carson called him “Reince Pubis”. I laughed out loud when I heard this. While many Americans might consider the chairman a dick, I don’t think anyone would call him a pubis, at least not to his face.

Dr.-Seuss-Mr.-Brown-Can--pTRU1-7363678dt

Poor Ben is confused and befuddled. Between not knowing how long a minute is or what to call the leader of his party, it is hard to imagine him reading anything. But then it hit me. Most (okay, all) adult books may be much more than Ben can handle, so why not introduce the perplex doctor to another doctor? I’d like to introduce Dr. Carson to Dr. Seuss. Let’s start him with “One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish (I Can Read It All by Myself)” and then work his way up to “ Mr. Brown can moo, can you?” Hopefully these two books will teach Carson numbers and why they matter and a book about proper pronunciation.

If the above-mentioned candidates take up my humble suggestions perhaps the next debate, while not as entertaining, might consist of some semblance of adult content and slightly intelligent ideas. But don’t count on it. From what I have seen these people pride themselves on holding ignorant worldviews and acting uneducated. And that my friends, scares me more than any national “threat” they shout about.

If you have reading suggestions for our candidates, leave them in the comment section. The world will thank you!

Amazing Waste

Repurposing Food and Reducing Waste

measurestillformeasure

Shakespeare, Classics, Theatre, Thoughts

Nerd Cactus

Quirky Intellect for the Discerning Nerd

Sillyverse

Stories of magic and mystery

Commonplace Fun Facts

Mind-Blowing Facts You Didn’t Know

Fictionophile

Fiction reviews, Bookblogger, Fiction book reviews, books, crime fiction, author interviews, mystery series, cover, love, bookish thoughts...

Patrick W. Marsh

monsters, monsters, everywhere

Shakespeare for Kids Books

Opening the door for kids to love Shakespeare and the classics

desperatelyseekingcymbeline

The 10-year Shakespeare New Year Resolution

Katzenworld

Welcome to the world of cats!

booksandopinions.com

The Book Reviews You Can Trust!

The Book Review Directory

For Readers and Writers

thelitcritguy

screams from the void

Author Adrienne Morris

Step Into the Past—Lose Yourself in the Story.

crafty theatre

ideas inspired by crafty characters

Critical Dispatches

Reports from my somewhat unusual life

The Nerd Nebula

The Nucleus of the Universe for all Nerd Hacks!